The Cost of Love

 

Feeling a little sad this morning.  We decided it was time to say goodbye to our old boy Packer last night.  He was a fixture in our lives for 14+ years, and the house feels strange without him.  I missed him limping his way over to me this morning to give me a good morning hug.  He was a crazy dog...but he was so sweet and I loved him the best I could.

As I contemplate my heartache over a dog...it strikes me that God is love.  Jesus came in love.  The Holy Spirit ministers to us in love.  We are made in His image, and we are called to so thoroughly love that it's becomes a badge that enables the world to identify the followers of Jesus.

But there's a serious cost to follow that call.

It costs us to love.  It costs our very selves because love is an utterly selfless thing.  It is caring about someone else even above ourselves.  It is sacrificing and compromising and all giving...all pouring out.

Thankfully, love is designed to be a relationship - a two way street - a pouring out AND a filling up. 

We love God and He loves us infinitely MORE.

We love a spouse and they love us back.

We love and old dog and we're met with faithful tail wags, a little jump of joy when they see us, and a sweet friendly presence to be with us...even if they are a hairy mess with awful (AWFUL) breath!

It's designed to be good and beautiful - a literal reflection of the amazing heart and character of our Creator.

But still...there's a heavy cost when choosing to love in this lifetime.

Too often, love is not reciprocated.

Too often, "love" is selfish and cruel (not actually love, but a misuse of the word).

Too often, the one(s) who are meant to love us the most are wrapped up in fear and hurt and lies...the best they can do is respond harshly and selfishly instead of gently as they strive to protect their already wounded heart. All they can pour out to their partner is the fear and hurt and lies that they're ruled by...and this upside down culture of ours encourages this as "strength" or "toughness" or "independence".

And even when we do find/discover/develop a (near) perfect Godly love that removes fear...that is patient and kind...that is giving and humble...that is honoring and self-giving...that is slow to anger an forgives quickly...that is a source of joy and comfort

...even then, there is a cost.

There is the cost demanded by time itself.

We see the precious hands weaken and the wrinkles set in.  The hair grays and the walk slows.  Time marches...marches...marches...

We know where it's leading.  We tuck the dread away, and pray an earnest, "Maranatha!" 

Yet, despite the cost, I choose love.

I choose connection and tenderness.

I choose to give my heart...my whole self...away.

Yes, there is a very steep cost of love...

...and I believe it's worth it.

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Just...Here.

Hello. My name is Daiquiri, have we met?

I haven't been blogging much...thought I'd better re-introduce myself ;-)

What's going ON with me? I used to use all my mental effort to restrain myself...to remove my fingers from the keyboard after 2 or 3 posts PER DAY. Crazy!

And now, I just have this peaceful quietness that's settled over my life, and I guess I just don't have that much to write about. I'm just...here.

It's not that I don't have much to say - quite the contrary. God is amazing. God is awesome. I've felt and lived these facts like never before. But do you want to hear me gush on and on about God? I have to think you're tired of hearing from me on this topic!

On the other hand, how do I not write about him? He's where I'm from...where I am...where I'm going.

He's my joy and peace and strength. The highlight of my days is cranking up the worship music, sitting on the floor, and just singing and crying (for joy) my eyes out! He is in 87% (give or take a point) of my thoughts, and I can feel him moving in me. I can feel myself giving in...surrendering...that number will be closer to 100% with each passing moment. And I love that :-)

I've found that something else comes with drawing nearer to God - an overwhelming sense that I don't know nuthin' about nuthin'! I'm the type of person who loves to figure things out and see how things work together. And when I see the pieces fall into place, I love to talk about what I've discovered. Blogging is a great way to share.

But now? Now that I'm sitting here with Almighty God, my silly little thoughts just seem to melt away. All I can seem to muster up is a quiet, awe inspired voice choked with love and gratitude that says,

Look at Him...just look at Him!

To be honest, I've wondered lately if I should continue blogging at all.

I look around the blogging world and I see so many talented and enthusiastic writers. They have enormous list of followers and subscribers. They're making real money in selling advertising. They're, by most standards, successful bloggers. I have to wonder...what am I doing here?

What are my intentions here? My goals. It's never been about followers or subscribers or money...well, okay...if I'm being honest, there WAS a time when it was about those things. I'd check my stat counter daily, I obviously run ads in this space, and I get a little thrill when I see a new follower. Where is the eye-rolling emoticon? I need a giant one of those right...

HERE.

My main goal though, is simply to share a little bit of my life...my faith, my struggles, my pictures :-) After all, there's only one me in the whole wide world. Maybe, just maybe, someone will be blessed by what I write here. Maybe someone will even come to know Jesus a little better.

And I keep coming back to my kids. Can you imagine what a treasure it would be to you if you had a journal like this from your mom, grandma, or great-grandma? A little journal filled with her personal stories and photos? Oh, what I would give for the ability to have my grandma's story on paper!

So I'll keep writing here. And I'll try not to be too bothered by the fact that at this moment I have 59 "followers", when I had 60 just yesterday (who are you, what did I say, why did you go??) ;-)

And if history repeats itself, which it seems determined to always do...I'll be struggling with fear and faith and surrender again in roughly 4.2 seconds. I'll come here to talk all about it, and then to share the incredibleness of the whole thing when my feeble faith is propped back up by my gracious (and SO patient) Jesus.

That's it for today. I'm off to finish my coffee, get my little ones dressed (hopefully before noon), straighten the house, and then process some photos from a shoot I did yesterday of a super-precious 2 week old little girl.

Have a great day, everyone!

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The Vacant Space

I have a confession. I've been holding out on you.

I found a blog that is challenging and changing me like none other, and I just can't NOT share any longer. You can find it HERE (The Internet Binge). The amazing woman who writes this blog is actually someone I love and respect very much. She is my sister-in-law (married to Luke's brother). You might recognize her voice...Esther comments here from time to time.

After blogging each day for a month, Esther is stepping away from the internet for an entire year. No blogs. No email. No Google. No You Tube. No news pages. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Cold turkey! Think about it!! Does it make your blood run a little chilly? It does mine! What would I DO without the internet?!

But here's the question of the hour...WHY?

Why does the idea of no internet access make me feel almost frantic?

Esther recently wrote about being a SAHM and how the internet helps to fill an empty space. The way she wrote it...it took my breath away! She said:

"They [children] force you to make space for them and then they don't fill it"

How beautiful and perfect is that statement. It really got me thinking about the vacant space that feels like it sits in the middle of my chest. I'm always feeling like I'm overwhelmingly needed. My to do list is infinite. The people who surround me are constantly in my face and near me and ON me (and don't get me wrong, I love it!). So how can I so often feel bored and lonely? It's that vacant space. When I'm forced away from the internet for a period of time - even just days or a week. That empty spot leaves me literally wandering around the house...a nibble of a chip here...a watering of a plant there...an adjusting of a crooked photo on a wall...a glance at myself in the mirror...thumbing through a magazine... Eventually I sit and rest and go to that space. It's then that I realize that it's in that spot that God resides. Why do I spend so much time filling that space with busy work and avoiding Him, I wonder? Maybe I'm the one who should be finding the big "OFF" switch on the internet.

What about you? Where would you be without the internet?

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New Picture

The picture I had of me over there on the left was starting to bug me.  It just didn't look like me anymore - I don't know what it was...a year or so since that picture?  I look (feel?) older now.  My hair is longer.  

Just tryin' to keep it real (and show you a cute picture of my wonderful baby boy ♥).

I'm also lovin' knowing how to make this little heart: ♥

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

PS.  To make one you type & hearts ; (without spaces) right in the text.  Cool eh?

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Three Things

1.  I'm so excited!  For a long time, I was just on fire for the "What the LDS church teaches" series, but after a while my passion just seemed to dry up.  I felt pretty strongly that I should wait on Him and His instruction and timing.  I was frustrated and a little concerned that maybe I was messing it up and that's why He pulled me from that project that was so important to me.  Well, my passion?  It's baaaaack! (cue creepy horror movie music)  

I sat up last night researching the next topic, and talked my husband's ear off until he had no choice but to fall asleep (including all sorts of snoring and leg twitching) while I was in the middle of a sentence.  I don't blame you, babe.  What's a guy to do when the girl will just not shut her mouth?! :)  

So, like I said, I'm excited.  Not about getting back to rocking the boat, but because it seems that God has something planned here.  I love being part of His plans.

2.  One of my favorite new bloggy friends asked me lately, "how's the training for the 1/2 marathon going?"   It's going...OK.  I think I started a bit too hard, and now I'm struggling to nurse my pain while continuing to work out.  I can run about 5 miles, but the last time I did it I had to stop about a mile from the end to cry and feel sorry for myself.  I must have been quite the sight - limping and blubbering my way down the street.  But then I sucked it up and ran the last mile (minus the block I had my little breakdown on).  Right now I have a one week "trial" gym membership.  I'm using it to keep my cardio strength up with low impact exercise and I'm living weights to try and build some strength.  

I'm gonna do that race.  My current game plan is to run the first 4 miles, then walk the rest of the 4 1/2 miles to the summit (because that last stretch is the steepest), and then I'll run as much of the downhill as my legs will allow.

In happier news?  Apparently, I have....ready for this?....TOES.  Seriously.  I looked down while standing in the shower yesterday and saw my toes.  I tend to carry my weight in my tummy, AND my posture never really recovered from the pregnancy posture (where my hips were sort of rolled forward, making my tummy stick out even farther).  So I've been dismayed to notice the absence of my toes from my natural field of vision.  But now, after all this exercise, I'm getting back to normal.  It feels great!

3.  I have a "friend" (you know who you are ;) ) who is famous (infamous?) for his jokes.  Well, last night he had me rolling, so I thought I'd share:

Have you heard about the new breakfast special?  It's called the "Octomom omelet".  It's made with 14 eggs, no sausage, and the guy in the booth next to you has to pay for it!

Have a great day, everyone :)

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There's Something About This Guy...

I admit, I did not vote for him.  I don't agree with many of his plans or philosophies.  But this guy...there's something about him that so powerfully inspires hope in me.  

Hope that he can turn our economy around.  Hope that he can bring peace (what will his take on Israel be, I wonder?).  Hope that he and his family remain safe.  Hope that he can deliver...

On election day my tears were tears of dread and disappointment.  Today, the tears were entirely different.  All those people, all those flags, all those powerful people up on that podium (along with bunches of security, I'm sure), all that beautiful music (although, the HAT, Aretha...what where you thinking?), all those powerful words, all that HOPE.

I'm so thankful to be an American.

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I'm Expecting!

Due Date: About a week from now

Gender: Incredible beauty and brains...a girl of course ;)

Stats: 24"screen and more power than I'll know what to do with.

Mommy is very excited for the new arrival! Vacuuming, floor scrubbing, and dusting going on today...must be "nesting".

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Lots Of Linky Love

I've been finding such useful, interesting, and inspiring stuff on the web lately. I thought I'd do a quick post to pass along some of these great links to some of my favorite people (that would be YOU!). Here goes...

1. Do you blog? Protect your blog by backing it up. It's as simple as a few clicks (I just did it and it took me literally about a minute and a half). Jen at Blue Yonder Design describes how to do it here. By the way - Jen is my wonderful designer who helped me with this blog's design and my new Photography website. She's just the best. If you're looking to have design work done (blog, button, logo, website, etc.), she's your gal!

2. If you want a more tangible backup (and have some money to spend on it), you could turn your blog into a book. I've been looking at doing this at Blurb.com. Here's where you can learn about it.

3. One of the very first blogs I ever read (and continue to read faithfully) is Like Merchant Ships. Although I've never met Meredith in person, I feel like she's a friend. Her blog has a simple peace about it. I'm always inspired when I read her stuff. She recently ran a post about a change in the laws dealing with children's clothes and toys. I could hardly believe my eyes! What would we (will we?) do without thrift store toys and clothes? Go read her article here, and tell her I say hi ;)

4. If you read this blog, you already know that Becky is a dear friend of mine. Well...she's been holding out on us all. Yes, she writes a personal blog. BUT she also writes a weekly devotional blog for our church's women's ministry. It's a treasure. Go see it...and bring an extra pair of socks because the ones you have on now? They're about to get knocked off! (By the way...leave her a comment to let her know you've been there. It's just the nice thing to do!)

5. Looking to become a better photographer? I found a great list of articles here. My favorite though, is this one.

6. Reader's Digest is giving away $30,000 to someone with just the right joke or funny story. Click on over and get signed up. If I win, I'm totally going to buy one of these beauties...with a wireless keyboard, mouse, new software, and this amazing screen. In the mean time, I'm taking cash donations. You can easily donate to my cause by simply clicking "send money" at PayPal. I'm kidding. Sort of. Not really. Oh...I really am kidding!

Sort of.

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Fun With The Stat Counter

I have a little do-dad over in my sidebar that keeps track of how many people come to visit this blog and how they got here, and I like to check it regularly. Do you think I'm obsessed with my "numbers"? I'm not. They're up and down like a puke-your-guts-out roller coaster ride, and if my self-worth was dependent on how many hits I had a day...well, it's hard enough to live with me...just couldn't do that to my family ;) I'm a numbers person though. I guess it's the geeky engineering side of me. I love data. I have no idea why. I'm fully open to the thought that it might be an illness.

But I'll tell ya...I get some good laughs from the "keyword" search tab on my stat counter. I don't think you all can see what I see, but I just couldn't keep some of this to myself any longer! It baffles my brain...the things that people search for. It's even more interesting that they find little ol' me when they go to their fancy internet machine to get some info!

Here's a sneak peek into the searches the people do - searches that eventually lead them to this site. The search (as they typed it in) is listed first, and then I comment after the "-":

Whole wheat pancakes from scratch - we like this recipe

Homemade pillowcases - I made these once! It was actually pretty simple. Been meaning to do a tutorial on it, but haven't gotten around to it.

How to make a bulletin board - I sure have some crafty folks finding me. Give this a try.

Recipe homemade salsa - Here's my favorite recipe (have some chips and a fizzy drink on hand!)

Thicken homemade salsa - try adding a little can of tomato paste

Organizing diapering station - After tweaking our setup through 4 kiddos, our system works great for us.

Psalm 23 crafts - You could try making a Psalm 23 bracelet.

Lds - I have such a love and a passion for my LDS friends and neighbors. We've had such interesting conversation about the teachings of their church. Check it out.

Mormon - Another name for someone of LDS faith.

Bran muffins Buttermilk - Mmmm...one of my favorite breakfasts. I like 'em best with blueberries in them :)

When making salsa do I have to take off the skins - I typically do because I think it's more sanitary to blanch and skin them. I've made it LOTS with the skins on too, and it's tastes fine.

How to poop in the morning - I'm assuming you do the same thing you'd do in the afternoon or evening.

Amazingly blessed - Me too, friend, me too.

What to do with lots of zucchini - Oh, do I have some ideas for you!

Fix cracked heels - I love this stuff. It worked better for me in the beginning of the summer than toward the end of the summer. It turns out the stuff has a trick...you have to put. it. on. I got lazy at the end, and my heels got terrible. Works great if you actually take the time to use it. Such strange things...the things I get lazy about.

How to keep Sabbath holy - We talked about this for my very first "Seek The Lord Sunday". Some people think it means simply going to church. Others go so far as to prepare meals in advance so they don't cook on the Sabbath. This is something I'd like to incorporate into our lives more. I have some praying about this to figure out what that would mean for our family (so does my hubby).

Why did the jews hate Jesus - From what I can gather from my Bible, the Jews didn't like Jesus because he claimed to be God. He told people that he was the promised Messiah prophesied in the Old Testament, and they didn't believe him. Claiming to be who Jesus was claiming to be was awfully serious business. The Jews took/take God very seriously - with great reverence and respect. Saying the things that Jesus said...if they're weren't true, those things would have been horribly blasphemous and offensive. Boy were they surprised when the whole earth shook at Jesus' death - not to mention how they must have felt when he rose from death! Many Jews became Christians after hearing the Gospel, praise God!

Why won’t blogger let me copy and paste - Because Blogger can be a total brat sometimes, and it's goal is to make you rip your hair out strand my strand. Tray switching over from "Compose" to "Edit HTML". You can do your copying and pasting there, and then finish up in "Compose".

Is God and Jesus two separate beings - This is so confusing, isn't it? I studied this one half to death to make sense of it, and I think I finally did. The short answer? No - God and Jesus are not separate beings. Jesus was God who humbled himself to come to earth as a human so that he could die for us, and save us from our sins. The long answer? You can read about it here. Thank God for that Good Book!

Why I’m leaving the lds church - Oh, God bless you.

Can you use canned tomatoes to make homemade salsa - Yes! I do it frequently.

Wife 4 cm dilated should I travel? Not unless you're traveling to the hospital... with your wife. Seriously, dude (did I just say "dude"?)...stay home, rub her feet, make her meals for her, and have your doctor on notice. Do I sound like I'm being silly? Are you taking me seriously? STAY.

How to teach children to put shoes on the right feet - This worked for us.

How to get picky kids to eat - I love toothpicks. Really...toothpicks!

Secrets of baking best chocolate chip cookie recipe - Mmmmm, do I have a recipe for you! Make sure your baking soda is fresh, use a cookie scoop and a timer, and don't over-bake.

Do you have to put jalapenos in salsa? - Nope. I like the spice, but you could skip it if you'd like.

Sunflower study - We had great sunflowers last summer? Wanna see? Click here and then here.

How do I keep my breast after I’m done breastfeeding - Um, well, they tend to stay attached to your chest even after you're done nursing. They may appear to be attached to your stomach, but they don't really move. BTW - a good bra goes a long way to hoisting the girls back up into their proper, perky place.

More of Jesus less of me - Yes please, me too.

I am waiting on God to rescue me from the flood joke - Yeah, that's a good one :)

Has Oprah lost her mind - Yes, I believe she has. In a very scary and dangerous way.

Organize hair accessories - Who knew that "organizing hair accessories" would become part of my resume?

Are dogs sick when they poop black - Could be. Or maybe he just ate a whole bunch of black jelly beans. Or licorice. I don't want to think about it any more - call your vet, please. Your dog will thank you. (Are you amazed by how many people show up here on poop related stuff? I am. And I don't think I like it much.)

Daqurie pregnant - AHHCK!! How dare you even say the words? When I'm just coming to terms with being done having babies. Excuse me, now I have to go have a cry. Thanks a lot.

How to seek the lord - The simple version: find a quiet place, and say something like, "I need you, Lord. Please help me." Works every time. The more fancy version: fast, pray, read your Bible, worship, spend time listening. It too, works every time. Bless you for your heart!

How to open a spaghetti squash - With a giant axe, baby! My wonderful readers left some great suggestions for opening them more simply (see the comments section of that post). I still prefer the axe method. I found that the kids gave me much less lip after seeing what I did to that squash with an axe. I think hubby was extra nice too ;)

Homemade hot fudge - Did someone say homemade hot fudge? Ooo...haven't had that in a long time!

Tested Joseph Smith - He deserves testing, anyone who claims to be a prophet must be looked at very critically. I don't believe he is who he said he was.

Dog hasn’t pooped in days - Wow. You're a better doggie mommy/daddy than I am! I couldn't tell you the last time one of my dogs pooped. They're doing it, I'm sure, but I don't keep track of it. Do you keep a chart or something? Days, eh? Maybe feed him less cheese? Or better yet, feed him several cans of pears. Works like a charm on babies.

Do you need to cook a jalapeno pepper when making salsa? No - I've never done so.

Call her blessed pancakes - Hey, who're you calling a pancake?

When the recipes calls for green onions do you use the stems? I don't, but I'm certainly no chef.

Cookie dough daiquiri - C'mon now, that's just mean. I have some pounds to lose, but I'm nowhere near earning the nickname "cookie dough".

Chicken beans pasta - I almost forgot all about this yummy dish! Putting it on the menu for next week.

Pain and post partum depression - Oh, girl, I'm with ya. Hang in there, and please know that you're not alone.

Pooptastic pooper - Um. Really? Yeah....I got nothin'.

Research on debbie meyer green bags - I love those crazy green bags!

Children’s cakes cowgirl - I loved making this cake, and my little cowgirl liked it too :)

Photography lighting - Oh boy. I'll bet this person was disappointed to find me during their search! I have so much to learn. Strobist is a good place for info on this topic.

Postpartum depression Christianity - Yeah, it happens to us too. I wish Christianity was a magic cure-all. But then I guess people would come to God for them instead of for Him, huh?

Post breastfeeding hormones - You'll cry. You'll laugh. You'll scream. You'll want to eat everything in sight. You'll do all of this frequently. Eventually though, you'll get back to your normal self. I found that a romantic getaway was very helpful. Tell your hubby that you just want to stop the raging hormones, and I'll bet you'll be on a plane before you know it!

Why is the church called her - I think probably because the church (the group or "body" of believers in Jesus) is referred to as Christ's "Bride" in the Bible.

Not willing to yield to god - Yeah, I feel that way sometimes too. But I've learned (the long and painful way) that there's no better place to be than in submission to our Awesome God. He loves you. He has a plan for you. A plan for a future and a hope. I really recommend giving it a try. Still don't have it in you? Pray to be made willing. I have to ask for help in this area a lot myself.

God as an artist - Yes, he is. Just look!

Why isn’t god a lunatic - Well, because he's GOD. He defines what's normal and what's not. We might not like how God has things arranged, but that means that we have the problem, not God.

But I'll bet that you were looking for something else. Perhaps it was the C.S. Lewis quote, "A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic - on the level with a man who says he is a poached egg - or he would be the devil of hell. You must take your choice. Either this was, and is, the Son of God, or else a madman or something worse. You can shut Him up for a fool or you can fall at His feet and call Him Lord and God. But let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about His being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us." In other words, Jesus was either a liar, a lunatic, or Lord. I'm going with Lord.

Why does my throat tickle when I’m sleeping - Have you checked under your spouse's pillow? Is there a feather under there? He/she must have one sick sense of humor. Or maybe it's post nasal drip. How do I know these things? I have no idea.

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Few Things Can Make Me So Grumpy

I was called for jury service for the week of the 15th. My son's birthday, my folks' visit from out of town, and my last opportunity to finish shopping is also happening that week (Insert strongest possible un-ladylike word here. Add a few exclamation points please.)

We've lived in Boise for 11 years now. I've been called for jury service...let's see...at least 5 times in the past 11 years. My hubby has been called...let's see...oh yeah, ZERO. Now, I'm not saying I want him to be called.

I am saying that the claim that it's a randomly generated thing is absolute garbage. Really - what are the odds that I'd be called so often, and he'd never be called? Someone, anyone...can you do statistics? What are the odds? I'd really like to know. It's a long shot, whatever it comes out to be.

Pardon me while I run out to buy a lottery ticket...

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Because My Teeth Are Just That Important...

As I stood in the bathroom last night listening to the hum and occasional beep of my Sonicare toothbrush, I did a quick calculation and figured that I brush my teeth for about 2 and a half hours a month. 2 1/2 hours!

Let's see...2 1/2 times 12...oh my. That's 30 hours a year I spend with my toothbrush, for pete's sake!

It's not like I keep a log or something...even I'm not quite that particular. My toothbrush times it for me - 2 minutes a brush. I do that at least twice a day, and sometimes 3 or 4 (it's a pretty effective way of getting myself to stop eating the chocolate already!). Those midday stop-eating-sweets brushes aren't usually the full two minutes. Multiply by 30 days in a month, and I figured it was about 2 1/2 hours a month.

This would be a good time for a disclaimer...I'm not insane. Well, mostly not anyway. I'm just partially brain dead at 11:00 PM, and these are the silly places my thoughts go while I brush my teeth.

The revelation that I spent that much time of my life doing something so mundane, got hubby and me talking about what else I do in a month....relative to brushing my teeth. Do I read books to my kids for more than 4 1/2 minutes a day (yes, whew!)? Do I fold laundry for that amount of time (oh yes, much longer in fact)? Dishes (yessiree)? Scrub floors or toilets (nope)? Pray (definitely)? Blog (oh boy, yes)? Think about what to blog about (I'm afraid so)? Take and edit photos (yep)? Say the words "Are you listening to me...please do xyz" or "Let's use inside voices, please" (probably!)? We were in stitches!

It put things in perspective, to be sure! I usually thing in broader and more general terms like "housework", "meal prep", and "raising kids". But these little things? These are the little things that my life is made of...down to the minute and second.

How about you? What are you spending your minutes and seconds on? Brushing your teeth?

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The Daily Grind

Is anyone else out there feeling like they're working double time only to get half as much done these days? Maybe it's just me. Maybe it's just hormones. In the words of my very wise and understanding husband, "What isn't all about hormones around here?!"

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Miscellany

Is Miscellany a real word?

- Do you know what I just now noticed? There's a tiny (itty-bitty-tiny) "D Rose Photography" in the bottom left of all my photos! Guess who didn't put them there...me! Guess who did...my wonderful miraculous Adobe Lightroom. Have I told you how much I love that program? This would be a great place to do all sorts of links to my past posts about Lightroom, but I'm not in the mood. Sorry.

- My Thomas is teething - pushing through some molars, poor guy. He's been cranky lately, but I didn't think to check for teeth. You'd think I'd know how to do this mommy thing now that I have an entire bushel of kiddos! I was playing with him yesterday, and when he tipped his head back and laughed a glorious and drooly belly laugh...I saw black and blue gums. That can't feel good!

- On my mind a lot lately? (see...I picked just the right title)

How do we gracefully share the gospel with someone who is going to face the Lord soon? I have a family member who's 85 years old with progressing lung cancer. I have the impression that she doesn't have much fight left in her. Years ago, I talked with her about Jesus and salvation, and the response I got was "I'm a good person, I'm not worried." She IS a good person...but does she know the saving power of Jesus? I don't know. Maybe it's too personal? Maybe it's not my business?

Maybe...but I still would like to have a conversation with her because what if she doesn't know! It's so tough for me. Easy to sit here and write about Him...but it seems that every time there's a face to face conversation, I end up offending someone. I'm not afraid to rock the boat and say what needs to be said...I just want the truth to be *heard*. Oh Lord, give me a more gentle and loving voice when I'm speaking your Truth!

- Another thing on my mind lately is food storage. What? Huh? I know...I'm all over the place today...not feeling my best and not up for graceful transitions between subjects. Anyway...food storage. I know a handful of people who are looking around at our political and economic situation lately, and they're worried to the point of stock-piling some food. Some are even talking "civil war". I could hardly believe my ears! What about you? Are you worried? I mean more than talking passionately about it over coffee worried...I mean stockpiling food and weapons worried? I don't know if I am yet, but it's sure giving me something to think about.

- Well, Clara should be home from school soon and I'm still sitting here in the yoga pants and t-shirt that I threw on as I rolled out of bed. Sammy's still in PJ's too. Did I mention I'm not feeling that great? Oh, why bother trying to fool you. I'm totally not showered or dressed by noon half the days of the week. My parents raised me right...don't know quite where I went wrong ;)

Sammy's screaming "MY ABOOON!!" from the living room. That means she let it go and it's dancing with the ceiling fan. I'd better run. Have a great day everyone.

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All In Good Fun

I just took a Facebook test...the "Dr. Phil Personality Test". My results are that I'm the "Lively Center of Attention." Well, that's a little embarrassing!

The detailed description said: "You are emotionally unbalanced and there is an immediate risk of a psychotic break. Please seek help immediately."

Just kidding! But that would have been funny, don't you think? It actually said: "Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not one to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out."

What do you think, friends? Accurate or not? (The second description, folks, not the first. If you think the first one is more accurate, I don't even want to know!) ;)

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Kaleidoscope

I had fun trying to get this shot last week. I was hoping to be able to get the entire view through the toy, but it was a no go. It turned out fun anyway :)

Here's another project I was working on for the last couple of weeks. I put this together for my Mom's birthday...it's one of my favorite shots, and in print it looks even more amazing. One friend I showed it to said, "Wow, how'd you get it to be 3D?!" I found a pretty frame with a nice mat, and added the Scripture to the bottom. I might have to make one for my own house. Considering I'm the photographer, my house has fewer of my photos than my friends'! And my friends' kids are photographed more often than my own!

In other news...I have a new addiction. It's called Facebook, maybe you've heard of it? It's so fun to get back in touch with old high school friends from...good grief...18 years ago?!?! I'm listed under my maiden name if you'd like to "friend" me: Daiquiri Fale.

Oh, and one other thing: I'M DYING.

Scare ya?

It's not like I have a terminal illness or anything...it's old age that I'm dying from. You are too, you know. We are closer to dying of old age right now than we were at the beginning of this post.

Can you even believe how cheerful this post has become?!

It must be because I have a birthday coming up. And I'm going to be 27 35. And I'll never be pregnant again. I'll never have a newborn again. I'll never nurse a baby again. I'll never see first steps again. Suddenly, it's like I can FEEL time flying by. And it's just flying so dang fast.

So I've been trying hard...making a real and concentrated effort...to enjoy every single little moment. To take more pictures (if that's possible). To hug and kiss and snuggle more. To notice the little details of soft baby hair, my little ones' sleepy bed-heads in the morning, dimples, drool...little ones who still enjoy spending time with me and their daddy more than anything else. To smile and just enjoy being here.

Well, it smells like the baby just gave me something new to...enjoy. Better run. Have a great day, everyone. Enjoy the little things...

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Can't Imagine Why...

I'm sure you've seen it - maybe you've even been on the short end of the job-cut-stick. I just read this on CNN.com:

"Job cuts: Who's next
Employees from Wall Street to Main Street are feeling nervous about their jobs, but certain industries are more at risk than others."

The full article can be found HERE if you're interested.

This whole mess just makes me feel so uneasy and unsettled...and just plain afraid. And very thankful for my husband's good job, even if it means he has to travel more than I'd like.

In other news, Benjamin is in the Boy Scouts program for his first year. It's so cute to see him all dressed in his uniform (One of the moms at the first meeting made the mistake of calling it an "outfit"..."Please, ma'am, it's a uniform" said the Pack leader. Well ok then!).

At the last pack meeting, Ben got his very first patch. The pride on his little glowing face was priceless!

I rushed home to immediately iron his new patch on his uniform. Oh, who am I kidding, I ironed it on just minutes before he needed his uniform for his next meeting. Anyhoo...went to iron the thing on, and look what I found on his Boy Scouts of America badge:

Front of the badge:

Back of the badge:

Hmmmm....

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Dancin' Gigglin' Fool...And Change

Oh, my little Thomas. He screeches at me ALL day long to the point of me wanting to absolutely rip my hair out...but he's so dang cute, he's pretty easy to forgive. His new thing is dancing. He finds a music making toy, gets it going, and then HE gets going. So darn cute! You can see for yourself in this video:

He's also quite the giggler. I just love how uninhibited kids are in their joy, don't you? You can't really see me in this clip, but I'm playing "peek" by hiding under his high chair tray (and nibbling his toes while I'm hiding), and then popping up to surprise him:

In other news...have you noticed how I'm have been quite the slacking blogger lately? Well, my little dancing giggler is now weaned. I go back and forth between feeling FREE, FREE, FREE AT LAST... and totally and completely useless. It's good to have my body back...the "workin' girls" are now free to be "party girls" once again ;-) (sorry Dad, more than you'd like to think about, I'm sure) But for 7 years I've been pregnant and/or nursing...it's tough to make the switch, especially knowing it's permanent.

Weaning has made my hormones run amuck too. I'm exhausted, I'm excitable...I'm nauseous, I'm starving...I'm crying, I'm giggling...I'm patient and loving, I'm a total raging B****.

Yeah, I feel sorry for my family too!

Now you know...

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Global Warming - Certain Crisis

It starts out innocently enough.

But then it starts to sneak up on you.

The next thing you know, you never see a good snow again.

And the polar bears...the poor polar bears.

Their homes are being destroyed...the ice cap is a-meltin'!

It's terrible. And scary. What if enough ice melts that the entire state of California ends up under water? That would really be a shame.

The native people up there? They might want to get on line and buy some bikinis.

Because every day...more and more ice is gone. Before you know it, it's gonna be like living in the tropics up there.

And down here? I just don't even want to think about it! It's going to be hot, and smoggy, and we'll all be grumpy.

Yet, without a good snow, what can we throw at one another?

I'm so worried, I really am.

Hot chocolate with mint schnapps just won't be the same...I just can't drink that stuff when it's 120 degrees.

Maybe I'd better go make myself another now, since it's obvious that we're headed for doom.

Yes. Most definitely...another. Because tonight? It's a sign. Global warming is certainly real. Just ask the... SNOW IN EARLY OCTOBER!

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Sick Baby, PO'd Birds

My little guy is sick today. He's been running at 103 degrees since yesterday afternoon. My day holds lots of baby snuggling, nose wiping, and hopefully...a shower for me. Hey, I can dream.

I'm have a bit of a paranoia problem today.

Clara and I harvested seeds from the giant sunflower she planted last spring. We salted them, roasted them, and then didn't eat them. They sat on my kitchen counter for weeks. Finally, we put them in the bird feeder. The birds do not approve. I'd say they think that the salted seeds are for the birds...but clearly, they are not...and that's the problem.

At first, I thought they'd eat them just fine. The birds flocked around the feeder pecking at the seeds and shuffling through the salted stuff to find the remains of the "good" seed still in there. And then, they sorta all looked at each other, and flew off.

The salted sunflower seeds sit in there to this day, uneaten. But as I was sitting at the table today watching a bird fly onto the feeder to investigate...was it my imagination?...I swear...that bird turned, looked at me, and glared...as if to say "What the....lady?!" He even ruffled his feathers a bit. I'm sure he was trying to flip me...HA!...the BIRD.

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So Now What Do We Do?

The "Bailout" didn't pass. The market took a serious tumble. What is your first inclination? Do you gather up some cash and buy low? Or do you hunker down...maybe stuff some 20's under your mattress?

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