Well, I'm home.  I was in Wisconsin for 8 days - 8 stressful, wonderful, oddly relaxing and life changing days.

My Mom's surgery went well.  Who knew that a person could go home less than 24 hours after BRAIN SURGERY?!  Not me!  Thank you to all of you who prayed for her.  Before surgery, she described how sure she felt that all would go well and that she'd be just fine.  To me, that's the very description of a peace that is beyond understanding.  Prayers are answered.  Again...thank you.

As I was sitting with Mom a day or so before I headed back to Idaho, she tried to describe how she was feeling.  She talked about an awareness of God's hand in her life - about how she's here on purpose.

On purpose.

Her words have been ringing through my head for days.  It's apparent for her - she just lived through a potentially fatal experience.  But it got me thinking.  I'm here on purpose too.  For a purpose.  For HIS purpose.

And today - once I got past the sheer panic and overwhelmed feeling of being surrounded by all this mess and chaos - I stared looking at this amazing life of mine.  I lived this day more deliberately that I've lived in a long time.  I lived in a way that if this were my last day, and I was giving the chance to go back and change anything about my last day in life?  I wouldn't change a single thing.

I snuggled.
I prayed.
I held little hands.
I breathed in the smell of little heads.
I looked deep into eyes of people who love me.  Really love me.
I enjoyed the taste of my food.
I bought a few little things that felt like treats.
I sang songs.
I felt the embrace of the man I am one with, and wasn't thinking of the housework I should be doing instead.
I enjoyed the sun on my face and the sun glowing through the golden fall leaves.
I smiled.
I laughed.
I thanked God for making me...

...for making me on purpose.

Jessica  – (11/01/2010 10:18:00 AM)  

Thank you for this, sweet friend! So glad you're back.

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