All is Well

We're supposed to be able to learn to say that "all is well with my soul" no matter what.  Clearly, I'm not there quite yet.  I am what I am...still a fearful child in the arms of a God I can't understand and still don't quite trust.  And I don't know how to pretend otherwise for anyone's sake, or for the sake of talking the good Christian talk.  Even if I could put on a show for you, what good what it do anyone?  God knows me.  For good or bad, He knows.  That's all that really matters.

I'm well because the cardiologist said that Ben is well.  To use her words, his exam was "pristine".  She felt pulses in extremities, listened to his heart in more ways than I thought were possible, she reviewed the labs, she double checked the ultrasound.

Apparently, there are cases where a person can turn alarmingly blue for no particular reason at all.  It could be a change in temperature, a viral reaction, a reaction to intense activity, etc.  My little Ben's heart is whole and strong and healthy.  It will continue to beat faithfully until the One who decides such things says it's time for it to stop.

Thank you, Lord.

Jessica  – (5/06/2010 02:47:00 PM)  

YAY!!! But oh, the anguish in the waiting to KNOW! I'm so glad to hear it!

BTW, my secret code (aka word verification) to post is "ingrate." Hmmm....

Liz  – (5/06/2010 02:50:00 PM)  

So glad to hear that all is well! When my little guy was about 4 years old, the dr. heard a heart murmur, and sent him for all kinds of tests to make sure everything was ok. Everything WAS ok, but while I waited to find out..that was one of the hardest times of my life. I distinctly remember thinking...Ok, Lord. This is one thing that I just dont think I can do...

Dont regret yesterday's post. You were honest, and I dont think your feelings are worse than any of us would feel in that situation. And even if you dont say it...God knows how you really, you're just being honest. Its better to let those feelings out to Him, and have Him strengthen you, than to pretend you are perfect and strong and unaffected. (I am all done pretending perfection in my life...) That's why we need Him after all, because we are mere faulty humans in need of a Savior. The Psalms read much like your post. In the end, Daquiri, you always come back to loving and trusting Him, and that's all that matters.

Sheila  – (5/06/2010 03:20:00 PM)  

I'm so glad!!!! Please don't regret yesterday's post. None of us have attained a perfect faith. It's a journey, and I thank you for sharing yours.

Sharon  – (5/06/2010 06:25:00 PM)  

Praise God. Alleluia. Thank you Jesus!

Becky Avella  – (5/06/2010 07:18:00 PM)  

Praising God with you. So thankful everything is OK with that precious boy of yours. We love him so much.

Hilty Sprouts  – (5/06/2010 09:09:00 PM)  

I'm so glad to hear it! I have been praying for Ben and peace for your mama heart.

Anonymous –   – (5/07/2010 07:23:00 AM)  

Wonderful news! Deep sigh of relief. What a wonderful Mother's Day Gift!

Kaye  – (5/07/2010 10:58:00 AM)  

Praise God! I am so happy for him and so relieved for you!

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