How's Your Soil?


I had a real wakeup call yesterday!

To appreciate my experience yesterday, I need to give a smidge of backstory.  I've been hearing "established by the laying on of hands" (see Romans 1:11) in my spirit very clearly and strongly for the last 18 months.  As we've prayed and sought the Lord during this time, my church family has been enjoying AMAZING blessing from the Lord.  I feel like I'm living the book of Acts - healings, deliverance, salvations, and the presence of God within my church family like never before.  It's been incredible.

And yet...I have this deep longing for MORE.  When I pray, the Lord gives me the the same answer about seeking Him with all my heart and being "established by the laying on of hands".

Ok, Lord, I'll do that.  Show me how!

I was led to a "random" (there is no random ;-) ) sermon by a semi-famous revivalist.  AND I learned that he's doing a preaching tour for the specific purpose of impartation by the laying on of hands!  I knew immediately that I'm meant to go see him in person.

I got the Lord's nod.

I got my husband's blessing.

I got my pastor's blessing.

I was *giddy* with excitement!

But I decided to give it a couple days to really just be SURE before spending all that money it would take to fly there, pay the registration fee, rent a car, stay in a hotel, and feed myself for several days away from home.  I was planning on getting everything booked yesterday.

And then a day or so ago... (very random curve ball coming your way)... I got it in my head that it's time to purchase an iPad.  I LOVE new tech.  Like...LOOVVEE new tech.  It's a major weak spot for me haha!

I shopped the different models, decided on the color, and had all the accessories picked out.

My heart raced with excitement at the anticipation!

But as I drove around town trying to find just the model and color I wanted, I became increasingly grumpy and irritable.  Angry even. 

A Choice

I finally realized that it was the money that was bothering me.  iPads are not exactly we really have the money for both the trip I wanted to go on AND a new iPad?

UGH.  I really wanted that iPad!

But I decided to go home empty-handed, and I was NOT happy about it!  I basically went home, booked the trip, and then had a pity party for the rest of the evening like some sort of toddler lol

I will seek the Lord, and He will add all else to me.  I know this.  I'll wait for Him to make a way for an iPad if it's useful to my work.

Please don't misunderstand - I say the above with hope and eager expectation...NOT with pride that I chose more of the Lord over a new toy (boy, when written like that it sounds utterly ridiculous!) 

If anything, I feel a bit of shame in how long it took me to choose, and for the resulting pity party that I allowed to ruin my mood all evening.

The Soil of My Heart forward to today, when I was spending time with the Lord and apologizing to Him for my immaturity and ridiculousness haha

I opened my Bible, and my eyes landed on the parable of the sower and soils in Mark chapter 4.  I encourage you to go read it now and really consider the soil of your own heart...that's what the Lord had me do today.

As I read it, I had the impression that the Lord was telling me that yesterday's experience was one of Him tending to the soil of my heart...a PREPARATION.

Do you know that God Himself prepares your surrendered heart to receive what He has for you?  He is the Potter to the clay...the Gardener to the garden...the Creator to the created.

Note that I said your SURRENDERED heart - He will not force Himself on you.  He will not drag you kicking and screaming.  He asks for my participation - my surrender...and THEN He goes to work.

That's not to say that the work He does is always pleasant.  Shall I say it again?  I REALLY wanted that iPad!

But look what happens if the soil of our hearts is not well prepared:

  • Satan can easily steal from us
  • We receive with joy from the Lord, but we're too weak to weather difficulties
  • We receive from the Lord, but we're easily deceived by riches
  • We receive from the Lord, but desires for other things destroy fruitfulness (hello...other many times have I choses some "other thing" over the Lord?!)

But those who's soil is GOOD enjoy the promise of bearing massive fruit in their lives for the Kingdom of God.  

Oh, Lord, let that be me!

Lord, I surrender my heart to you.  Please continue to work in me to remove the rocks that cause shallow soil, and the weeds that choke out Your Word.  Purify my heart to hear the Word, accept it, and bear fruit thirty, sixty, and a hundredfold.

Please bless my upcoming trip so that I learn and experience more of You, and that I am established for the work You have for me.

To Your glory, Jesus...and to the advancement of Your kingdom come on earth as it is in Heaven.

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