The In-Between

Today is a quiet, grey, and rainy day.  Well, quiet but for the birds singing their songs from my trees.  There's a little red-breasted bird that keeps visiting my bird feeder.  My Grandma loved birds - the last gift I gave her was a little ceramic bird that looks like this same little bird on my feeder.  When I watch that bird peck at the thistle, I see my Grandma lying on her couch, carefully opening the package, and the happy gleam in her eye as she held that little piece of bird-shaped glass.

"Put it over there", she said in a quiet voice.  She was smiling at me and pointing a tired finger at the shelf that was in her line of vision when she rested on the couch.

I gave it to her as a Christmas present.  It was Thanksgiving time, but I knew I wouldn't be back for Christmas, so I gave her the gift early.  I think I knew in my heart that it would be the last time I saw her.  That must have been the reason for my compulsive need to hug and kiss her and to keep telling her how much I loved her.

"Ya.  Love you too", she'd say with a gentle hand patting my cheek.  I loved her hands.

Hmmm.  I don't quite know where this is coming from.  I sure didn't sit down with a plan to write about Grandma.

I'm in limbo today.  Sort of half way between doing about 15 things.  Can't figure out what I want to do...what I should do.  Wandering around the house...tinkering...looking...feeling uneasy.  I wish God would send me a memo with some life's goals outlined for me.

I can't quite tell if I'm bored or overwhelmed.  Know the feeling?

B.D.Riehl  – (5/18/2010 01:04:00 PM)  

Oh my do I know the feeling!
Hope you don't mind that I peeked in on your blog from Becky's. I've been in the marriage class with you this semester and have greatly appreciated all your thoughts and stories.
If you find a way to get that memo, could you forward it on? ;)

Anonymous –   – (5/18/2010 03:03:00 PM)  

I have always loved that picture of Mom- just went to the cemetery today to plant the flowers. We put a geranium in the middle with a spike and two snap dragons-it looks beautiful on one hand but not right on the other hand! Do you know what I mean?

cherimarie  – (5/19/2010 05:15:00 PM)  


I think I feel this way too sometimes. What is my life's purpose? What does God want me to do TODAY? I don't like feeling in a rut and sometimes what He wants me to do is just love my family today. Ready I should be asking myself if I'm ready to obey TODAY? :)

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