One Merciful God, One Lunatic, & One Very Wise Man

Well, we made it home last night! Technically, it was this morning that we made it home...but we slept in our own beds for at least part of the night, so I'm calling it making it home last night.

By the time we got to the Milwaukee airport, our flight was already so delayed that we could see that we'd miss our connecting flight in Chicago. Imagine my surprise...you all know how I love the Chicago airport! I was tickled when we were actually switched to a different airline, and re-routed to fly through Minneapolis instead of Chicago. Thank you, Lord! Even if the worst happened, I'd rather be sleeping in the Minneapolis airport than the Chicago.

Time was tight though, so we had to hustle through security. Have you ever tried hustling through security? With four kids? How about when you're "randomly chosen" to have advanced screening done? Yes...it was lovely. My 5 year old daughter actually got patted down. I was gritting me teeth the whole time (more on that later). They went to pat Samantha down, but she ran away screaming "No! Daddy!" Thankfully, they didn't force her. She's been known to carry bombs in her pants, but not of the type they'd be interested in.

It was also extra special to watch a young man open every single pocket and pouch and nook and cranny of my carry-on bag. He looked through every crevice of my wallet. He felt and squished every spare diaper to feel for...I don't know...weapons? And the best part? When he found THE small purse within my carry-on. It holds my...ah hem...feminine hygiene products in the event of an emergency. Girls, you know what I mean. He pulled them all out. He felt each one. He then, oh so delicately, with his man hands, tried to shove everything back into place.

"Attention travelers! Please... someone left something very important back at the security checkpoint. It appears to be a woman's last remaining shred of dignity. Please return and do the chicken dance in your undies if you'd like to claim it."

Hey, it could be worse. At least I wasn't this gal.

So on we went to our gate, where they stopped us and told us that the booster seats we'd schlepped through the airport could not go on the plane. To their credit, the darn things say right on them that they're not FAA approved. I didn't know...it was especially confusing and frustrating since we'd brought them on planes before with no problems. It was at this point that I did more gritting of teeth. I actually turned away, bit down into a blanket of Thomas' I was carrying...but held my tongue. Oh, what a proud moment. I'm not usually much of a tongue holder. See me? I'm so mature.

After that, our flight went smoothly. We went on to Minneapolis without a hitch.

Our layover was long enough that we were able to get a bite to eat and let the kids run and play for a while. It was nice. We got the kiddos all jammied up before the next flight, got settled in...and waited for over an hour for them to make a seat belt repair. More gritting of teeth. Finally...we were on our way. Only 3 more hours until we touch down in Boise! And get our bags! And get a cab! And drive home! Only...!

We finally got home at about 2 AM. See? God answered my prayers. We were home. We were safe. It was...um...an adventure...but all things considered, we really couldn't complain. God is good. God is Merciful.

So the lunatic? If you haven't figured it out already...that would be me. I've been a hormonal mess the past couple of days. Was I like this before having babies? No, really....Hubby, I don't actually want you to answer.

Before we left Wisconsin, I stopped by the store to get a bottle of "bitchy pills". I believe the stuff is called "Pamprin" (what a terrible name). I gave them a little shake, and showed them to my Hubby. "Hey look! They actually make bitchy pills! I bought some, maybe they'll work. It actually says right on the bottle: 'for irritability'. Isn't that great?!"

Hubby looked at me. He opened his mouth and shut it again several times with no sounds coming out. He concluded by saying "I am SO going to keep my mouth shut", and he walked out of the room leaving me shaking my bottle of Pamprin.

Now that, ladies and gentleman, is my husband. He is a VERY. WISE. MAN.

Hilty Sprouts!  – (4/02/2008 10:32:00 PM)  

The dude is one smart cookie. Husband survival skills 101!

Jen

Alicia  – (4/02/2008 10:39:00 PM)  

Glad you and yours are safe and sound =)

Anonymous –   – (4/03/2008 08:06:00 AM)  

Daiq,

You are so funny I can hardly stand it! Miss you a ton!!!!!!

Mom

Stefan, Sarah and Lukka  – (4/03/2008 08:09:00 AM)  

haha!~ that's so funny (well, not your experience...I'm laughing *with* you!)
my bitchy pills, however, would be called cadbury caramilk.

Crystal  – (4/03/2008 11:30:00 AM)  

That was a great post!!! I was laughing out loud!!! Smart man, your hubby : ) Praise Gid you made it home!!

Anonymous –   – (4/03/2008 09:32:00 PM)  

You are a great writer. I love that you find humor in most everything!

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