Whenever I have a humbling experience seemingly from out of nowhere, I call it "being smacked upside the head with the humility stick".
I got a good whack today :-)
Don't get me wrong...I'm not under any delusions that I can sing. I used to be. You know, back in like the 6th grade when I'd record myself singing "The Greatest Love of All", and then playing it back to hear how I sounded.
In fact, it might have been that very experience that led me to the realization that I really can NOT sing. Oh well. I keep hoping and praying that when I get to Heaven, the Lord will do some work on my vocal chords so I can praise Him the way I really want to.
In the mean time, I try to stick to the simple stuff like "Twinkle Twinkle" and "Old Mac Donald". The kids don't really mind. Or so I thought...
I was driving in the car this afternoon with Sammy and Thomas in the backseat. We were all sort of lost in our own worlds.
My mind was wandering down the road to Wisconsin, where my dear Grandma is in a hospital bed suffering. I prayed. I cried a little. I thought of Grandma and her drawn out "Yellloooo" when she answers the phone, and her witty sense of humor. I thought of my last trip to Wisconsin. Grandma was a little unsteady, so I liked to thread my arm through hers and we'd walk arm in arm. I can still feel her on my arm.
Of course, we can not know who's saved and who's not. But if you can tell what's going on in a person's heart by the way they live their lives...Grandma is saved. I am so thoroughly and eternally thankful for that. I'm thankful that we'll never have to say "goodbye", but rather, "see you later". Now that's a comfort that none can offer but Jesus.
I love my Jesus.
When I think about Him, I inevitably start to sing whichever hymn comes to mind. That's what I did in the car.
It was a quiet song, from my heart more than from my vocal chords.
It's too bad that songs from the heard don't sound more beautiful to the human ear.
From the back seat, Sammy snaps out of her world and says, "Mamma, if you're gonna sing, would you please turn on some music? Turn it on LOUD."
I hope the Lord hears my heart more than my voice ;-)