Oh, the Joys...

I loved being pregnant.  

Well, the first 2 or 3 months weren't so fun.  I lived little more than vanilla yogurt, and nearly threw up at every food commercial on TV.  I remember screaming at the TV one day "That should be illegal!  That's obscene and disgusting!"  Then I started to gag a little at the pictures of (gasp) Applebee's food....then I cried because I was feeling a tad insane.

Aside from THAT, I loved being pregnant.

I felt good about myself and my little role in the miracle of bringing a new life into the world.  

I actually liked maternity clothes...excuse me...they're all soft and comfy with tons of elastic.  What's not to love?!  And by the time I was pregnant with Thomas, maternity clothes was actually fairly fashionable too.

And, talk about miracle, I liked my body during pregnancy too.  I felt beautiful...the whole glowing thing I guess.  

That brings me to my story...

I was pregnant with Clara.  Ben was just a little guy.  He was only 13 months when she was born, so I guess he was probably 12 months old when this story took place (oh my...how did I DO that?!).

Ben and I went to the store for groceries.  More specifically....we went to the store for avocados.  I'm a guacamole junkie, and what better time to indulge yourself with all your favorite treats than during pregnancy?

I was thrilled to find some avocados that were actually ripe enough to eat THAT day.  Oh...God is good, indeed!

So I got my avocados, and then I cruised around the super-store for an hour or so to just see what I could see.  I did that a lot when my kids were really little - got us out of the house.

On that particular day, I felt really great because of all the positive attention I was getting at the store.  People seemed to stop and just watch glorious me walk by with my beautiful baby boy.  My round belly was getting all sorts of appreciative looks - smiles all around.

Dang...I must be one hot mama!  (Just kidding....even in my most confident moments I didn't quite go that far!)

But I did feel good.  I felt alive.  Happy.  Pretty.  Proud of my little boy.  Excited to be pregnant.  REALLY excited to get home and have some guac.  Life was good.

And then, Ben and I went to get in the car.  As we strolled outside, he in the cart and me pushing, he was adamantly trying to get my attention about something.  He was reaching and pulling and just doing all he could to to...what? ....grab my shirt?  I didn't understand what he was doing.

So I looked down to inspect my shirt.  Nothing.

My little Benjamin would not let up.

So I grabbed the bottom of my shirt and pulled it away from my body to better inspect it.  If you've been pregnant, you understand what I'm talking about.  When you're THAT pregnant, there's a whole southern hemisphere of your body that you CAN'T SEE because...well...your eyes reside in the northern hemisphere.

And guess what I found when I inspected said southern hemisphere?

I found this stuck to my shirt:



Apparently, when I leaned over the avocados, my shirt picked up one of the stickers and it found it's way to the perfect location of my full (RIPE) belly.  I'd been walking around with it for a good hour.

I'll just leave it at that.  I could go on to describe how I felt in that moment, but I won't.  I'd hate to interrupt your laughter....

Craig and Bethany  – (10/21/2009 11:07:00 AM)  

Hahahaha! Hilarious. We recently found out we're pregnant with number four. I'll consider myself forewarned. :) Great post.

Jessica  – (10/21/2009 11:34:00 AM)  

Love it...

Okay, so you opened this can of worms.

My experience was less flattering by far. I was about 10 months pregnant with Zac when I was shopping at Albertson's. I was checking out, and the store I was in had a round carousel thingy that the checker put the groceries on so the bagger could grab the groceries and put in bags. I had only a small amount of groceries, so the checker bagged my stuff and put it on the carousel. When I went to reach for the bag, the carousel turned and moved the bag just out of reach. The checker turned the carousel to put the bag within reach and I reached for again only for the carousel to turn and send the bag out of my reach again!

After the third time, I was ticked. I stared daggers into the checker and said, "You think that's funny?!" He looked at me and said, "You're doing it!"

Every time I leaned in to grab the bag, my stupid belly was hitting the button that turned the carousel. And I was so huge, I didn't even feel it!!!! Whatever. That was almost 11 years ago and I still get upset about it.

Sharon  – (10/21/2009 12:11:00 PM)  

BWAHAHAHA! That is TOTALLY something that would happen to ME!

You're too fun

ruth stiles  – (10/21/2009 02:42:00 PM)  

now that I have dried the tears and my side doesn't hurt anymore...THAT is too funny.
The things that happen to us at the "least opportune" moments!

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